Talk:2013 Florida State Seminoles football team

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This review is transcluded from Talk:2013 Florida State Seminoles football team/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: TonyTheTiger (talk · contribs) 23:08, 24 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]

• I'll review this.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 23:08, 24 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• The toolbox to the right indicates 1 dab and 1 deadlink.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 04:22, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• Please re-read the article and check for tenses. Sentences like "Nick O'Leary (grandson of Jack Nicklaus) was involved in a motorcycle accident but is expected to be recovered by the start of the season" should have been changed by now.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 23:08, 24 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• I see no statistical summary for the team.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 23:09, 24 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• I see no summary of the 2014 NFL Draft. I should be able to see how many players were invited to the NFL combines already. The section should discuss all key players who did and did not declare for the draft.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 23:10, 24 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• I would also mention the class of 2014 class ranking and highlights.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 04:51, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• a lot of content in this article fails WP:V, including entire paragraphs. Every fact in this article needs an WP:IC from a WP:RS.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 03:20, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• There are numerous properly licensed images on Flickr. Please add freely-licensed images.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 03:20, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• Italicize publications like SI and ESPN the mag.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 03:44, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]

WP:LEAD

• The lead does not summarize the article or a proper description of the season that should be in the article very well. I am not an FSU fan, but I am well aware it should not take too long before the name Jameis Winston is mentioned in regards to this season. Major awards, records, statistical championships and such should all be summarized in the LEAD.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 02:06, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• LEAD Is currently 887 characters of readable prose, I would expand it by at least 2000 characters. It should be close to 3000 characters given the amount that there is to say about this season.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 03:24, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• I'd mention 11 players drafted and 6 coaches departed.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 04:04, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]

Preseason

• Spring football is a time when interesting positional battles are discussed in the press. You just give us one sentence regarding the spring game. Positional battles either need to be mentioned here or in the preseason somewhere.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 03:37, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• Here you should mention which players were watchlisted or pre-season All-American.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 03:38, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• Even if there was not a battle, here is where you discuss transition from outgoing player to new player.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 03:41, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• Did Winston just walk into the starting role or was there a battle. What about other new starters.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 03:41, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• State which freshmen enrolled in January to participate in Spring football.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 03:50, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• create a preseason subsection in the personnel section.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 04:01, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]

Returning starters

• Please tell me if any returning starters were 2012 All-ACC selections.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 03:46, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]

Other selected comments

• Please add some prose regarding the recruits. I am sure several of these players were highly touted and played in high profile All-American games. I am guessing Ramsey, Thomas and Green have some press worth noting. Please give some prose regarding the classes rank.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 03:32, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]
• I notice that the postseason award winners were written in prose. I think prose looks better than bulletpoints for this kind of content. See the other articles mentioned below as examples.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 04:59, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]

Game summaries

• I am impressed with some of the features of the game summaries (series records and pregame lines).--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 04:34, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]

• I am kind of on the fence regarding FAILing this article, but I think it falls short of what a reader would think is high caliber for a national champion. Look at good articles 2009 Alabama Crimson Tide football team, 2011 Alabama Crimson Tide football team and 2012 Alabama Crimson Tide football team and featured article 2005 Texas Longhorns football team for some ideas.--TonyTheTiger (T / C / WP:FOUR / WP:CHICAGO / WP:WAWARD) 04:59, 27 April 2014 (UTC) [reply ]

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