Quotes Of The Year[edit | edit source ]

Mr Dick Discussing How People Will Socialise With Their Comrades.

Mr Chapman the Lad.

Mr Nohnson Dissing Mr Jiggins.

A lesson with Miss Aktnins.

 Miss Tucker (***Pornstar Of The Year***) showing her True COLOURS.

The Overview Of Gruntshaw[edit | edit source ]

The Exterior of Gruntshaw looks like any other stereotypical school in England. Usually people from Croydon will welcome you at the front gate with a joint in one hand a knife in the other, and will usually smile bearing all their stained rotten teeth. Don't forget essentially 100% of the schools population is Asian as we do live near Lindia (London-India). When you enter the building you'll be greeted by the Saviour that being of course Mr House who is usually accompanied by at least 20 people who are armed with AK-12, Bullet Proof Vests and also they're suited for all forms of combat whether close quarters or long range. Once you manage to make it pass through the many security checks that the citizens of Gruntshaw have to go through you'll find yourself in a normalish looking lobby area. If you continue down the corridor you'll pass the hall where propaganda is produced and then distributed across the Gruntshaw empire. Even further and you'll start feeling the effects of The One Way System when you encounter the Maths and English block. The logical thing would be to go down the stair case, but you have the go the full way round. Back to the lobby area, and if you turn left you'll go down a corridor filled with a load of crap that no one honestly cares about. Dark room, blue house, furniture rooms, random rooms no one ever goes in, ect. Back to the lobby area one more time, and if you turn right you'll be passing by Gruntshaw soldier training grounds, media resources ("Where I spend most of my day"), Sixth form which is essentially used as a place to publicly display and embarass students and before you get there you'll pass the teacher chill-axing room, where the stresses of the regime can be rubbed of with their amazing coffee machine which by the way was removed from the main hall because students kept using it to appear like they cummed themselves by just taking milk samples and not the coffee. However this empire retains its status as "just a school" by doing the stereoypical layout from above making the school look like one of the (削除) deformed pieces of horse meat (削除ここまで) they serve and they label it "Fresh Chicken Nuggets" (Freshly cut grease of the dinner ladies). The religious studies block we can only assume is an inverted clitoris entering a deformed horse meat nugget.

Toilets[edit | edit source ]

Upon entering a toilet at Gruntshaw you'll be wondering how the black plague hasn't made a return. Within cubicles, depending on the gender, you can find various items. Males usually dispose sandwiches, coats, umbrellas, nooses and various other items. Whilst females prefer to keep it fairly simple with tampons, dildos and flavoured anal beads. However with students entering there years of puberty you may be greeted to the boys toilets with moans and groans. Indeed it sounds rather pleasuring, one may join in if so desires. Gruntshaw is also praised for the many different types of shits that are found in the loo's, some are sloppy, some are corny, some are rock solid and on other occasions some of them look like a blast from Poseidon's shotgun. Some shits have gained the name UFO (Unidentified Floating Object) for their ability to float although you've already tried flushing it down the toilet ten times, and it still manages to float somehow. Also it's fairly well known that cults use the toilets as their base of operation, so information can easily be sourced here by looking at the back of toilet doors. This does sometimes result in the cult performing their satanic rituals which include shitting on the toilet lid, painting shit across the wall, pissing on the ceiling and so on. Don't forget "Daddy's Lair" which is what the "Science" toilets have been dubbed for being a sex playground for all year groups. Usually groups of 30 males will bundle together in one cubicle and fondle with each other scrotum's until all of them have secreted in their pants, then it's collected into a large bucket and sent to a sperm bank. Some choose to keep supplements for there own personal use, it's highly debated whether they use their cum for some weird Heeki-Deeki self pleasure or they're paranoid someone may steal their cum so they hoard it (in large bundles). One other figure that is feared through out the school is St David who regularly releases gas grenades that puts people in an unconscious state, so if you ever see St David exiting a toilet, avoid going into it at all costs (Or you're putting yourself at risk of going unconscious whilst the head of the shit is just pocking out)