User:Aleister
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The pancake softness scale measures the softness of pancakes. It also measures the softness of turtles. - the totality of an IP's huffed article
Next Halloween in Jerusalem
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The Great Buddy Rich
For those who haven't seen this, Funnybony says it's the best drumming he's ever seen (for those who know what that means, that's saying something), including the world's fastest-ever drum solo at 3:30
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Watch this Sun Dance in full screen for lasting effect
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photos of my backyard, taken with a Cell phone:
Pages created by this semi-literate idiot
- Festivu s featured
- Mortal Si n featured
- Corpsearia n featured
- Chicago Seve n featured
- Giant Jew Ban d featured
- Warm piss wate r featured
- Cemetery of the Absur d featured
- Why?:Reinvent the whee l featured
- UnPoetia:Well-Oiled Birds featured with Guildy
- God's deleted contributions featured
- Ghosts never seem to play fai r featured
- UnBooks:The Old Man and L V featured
- People Who Like to Fuck Nake d featured
- HowTo:Turn nature into collectible s featured
- A pizza a day keeps the doctor awa y featured
- UnBooks:The Second Conquest of the Moon featured
- UnBooks:My Daddy Has Two Yacht s featured
- UnBooks:Fishing For Childre n featured
- California Marijuana Initiativ e featured
- Rock and Roll Hall of Fam e
- HowTo:Create a sandstor m featured
- Dennis Kucinich's wif e featured & good on vfg
- HowTo:Get a sunta n
- HowTo:Blow a do g featured
- Above Top Secre t featured
- Anne Hathawa y featured
- Snow Angel s featured
- Bing Crosb y featured
- Viking Meta l featured
- Garage sal e featured
- Tombston e featured
- Sideboo b featured & good on vfg
- Peacock featured
- Role x featured
- Be d featured
- Skun k featured
- Disg u is e featured
- Dreamin g featured
- Phil Och s featured
- Todd Pali n featured
- Bipolar Gir l featured
- Laugh trac k
- James Beve l featured
- Will Harridg e featured
- Britainy Spea r
- Oz (TV series ) 'featured
- Whale (colour ) born and featured on Illogicopedia
- HowTo:Beet of f feature
- Find the Frogg y
- Damaged good s featured
- Claudette Colvi n featured
- Never on Sunda y featured
- December 23, 201 2
- HowTo:Make it drin k feature
- HowTo:Go into the ligh t featured four days in a row!
- Homophones (grammar ) featured
- Poop throwing monke y s good on vfg
- UnBooks:Luck of the Iris h born on Illogicopedia
- Welcome Party for Noob s
- Uncyclopedia is almost ful l featured
- UnBooks:A new lease on lif e
- James Bevel's face in a cloud featured
- UnBooks:Stairway To Heave n
- UnTunes:Troops on the Groun d
- Yes! Yes! A thousand times yes!
- UnBooks:My Pal Stanley Kubrick feature
- The Wingfield family photo album
- I must stop editing and go to sleep
- The USA versus the primitive Taliba n with 90s Kid21 featured
- HowTo:Put the toothpaste back in the tube
- UnBooks:Did you ever lock horns with a goat ? featured born and featured on Illogicopedia
- Animals with feet war with animals with no fee t featured
- UnBooks Biography:The guy who invented soap featured
- Uncyclopedia:Dance like you've never danced before
- HowTo:Teach a six-legged lame man how to jump rope featured
- That time I took a sojourn to visit my friend Jim Freklowsk i
- That time I nearly drowned during my sojourn on the Titani c
- Guidebook to the Voting Rights Movement related faces in the clou d featured
- Newport Cigarettes because fuck yeah I'm drunk let's have some fun featured
- As generals gathered in their masses, just like witches at black masses.
Major rewrites by an illiterate cowherder
- Tantr a featured a guy thought we were Wikipedia. Add'd humour, pics, data & links, with Funnybony.
- Ann Coulte r featured rw of a GerryCheever rw
- Marilyn Monro e featured VFD save of Claudius Prime's page, later with Black Flamingo.
- Kitten Cookboo k featured VFD save, nice assists by Romartus and Zana Dark.
- Mohandas Gandh i featured editaddits, pics, with MrN9000 & Ryuken.
- In-A-Gadda-Da-Vid a featured existing page by PF4Eva, accidental collab.
- HowTo:Frighten small childre n featured expanded idea and pics pics pics!
- Jesus was Christian, NOT Jewis h featured two days --- VFD save of a 92 vandal page
- Pearl necklac e featured rw & pics, VFD save.
- Puddle of shi t featured a shameful VFD save
- Evil Jesu s featured VFD save of an IP ravaged Zim page, editsaddits and pics!
- Spide r featured rw with Fredd after a deluded user put it on VFH.
- Yoda featured joined a save by Xamralco, voted the second best article of 2012!
- Thainglish VFD save, featured elsewhere
- Isaac Asimov VFD save, kept the original concept
- Star of Davi d from a stub, expanded existing twisted idea.
- Ev e, Unununiu m, and Phoenix Islands, kept some, lots-o-addits, pics.
- Communio n, Bob Marle y,Mark David Chapma n and The Great Bunny War, likewise.
- Fair citizens 'cept for the first paragraph left by a troll IP - some o' the same with Australia's histor y.
Frat, Colonizations, and other collabs talked into by workaholics
- Chicke n featured Frat collab
- Dinosaur s featured Colonization
- Friday (song ) featured added to 74.77.239.74's page.
- Jack Dempse y featured played along with Funnybony on his page.
- Science fiction featured Colonization
- Bruce Wayne featured Colonization
- Dead Dick s featured played on Funnybony's extremely good anti-war page.
- Mike Tyso n featured played along with Funnybony on his page.
- Blockbuster featured Frat collab
- Tim Burton featured Frat collab
- Ron Paul featured lots of edits with MrN9000 on page mostly shaped by Jocke Pirat
- Nintendo featured First Frat collab
- Weir d featured Frat collab with Black Flamingo
- Inbox featured
- Taco featured Frat collab
- Lonely Hearts Column featured Black Flamingo's page, as one of his gang of ten.
- UnNews:FED cites plight of Kennedy, Jesus to warn dissenters featured editsaddits to Funnybony's very good page.
Several coats o' paint on these and others
- Frankly Disappointing Telescope featured added lots of PicsnCaptions to a great NicknNora page.
- United States Emperors, exorcised the soul of Dick Nixon, crowned Sinead O'Conno r as the once and future Emperor. At times reverted by citi zens.
- Clara Bo w, Clara Crow, UncleTom, Snake land pine anaconda, Rasta zz woods f, ph o sher b dog w a t c h i n g
- Chicago Cub s back to its original theme, editsaddits.
- Camera Obsura Collection, a one-time user's extremely good article, editsaddits&pics featured
UnStuff reported by this unscribe
- UnNews:Marijuana Legalized in Florida for Even-Numbered addresses featured lead UnNews for four days
- UnNews:Pope Benedict Tackled, Demands Rematch
- UnNews:Kennedy Assassination Solved featured
- UnNews:Brett Favre Commits Harakiri
- UnNews:Doll Takes The World By Storm
- UnNews:Animals the size of tanks spotted in large cities
- UnNews:Earth gains on Mars for sandiest planet featured
- UnNews:Comcast fires Keith Olbermann for knowing too much
- UnNews:First Pet Rock passes away featured
- UnNews:Abraham Lincoln was an asshat, historian concludes featured
- UnNews:Wisconsin governor introspective as thousands protest
- UnNews:5-year-old tricks Wisconsin governor featured with a great "Madison Movement" audio by Dexter and Mrthejazz.
- UnNews:Body of last World War I veteran to be shot to moon
- UnNews:"You Belong in a Zoo" man turns 100
- UnNews:Wheelchair-bound grandmother rescued from Reactor No. 4
- UnNews:China perfects gibbon arm transplant
- UnNews:911 conspiracies explained by a sandwich featured twice three days in a row
- UnNews:To honor Earth Day, man goes over Niagara Falls in teacup
- UnNews:Kate Middleton's Pa readies shotgun wedding
- UnNews:UnNews obtains Bin Laden death photo
- UnNews:U.S. releases bin Laden home movies
- UnNews:Mobster enters weak GOP field
- UnNews:Occupy Uncyclopedia
- UnNews:Japanese Attack Pearl Harbor Again!
- UnNews:Bibowler Girl bowls 900 series
- UnNews:Man awakes from 25 year coma, gets irritated
- UnNews:Cuban bicycles to freedom, quickly returns
- UnNews:Tim Tebow routed in NFL playoff game
- UnNews:Newt Gingrich calls kettle black, GOP monkey house continues
- UnNews:"All Narcissists Look In A Mirror Day" celebrated featured
- UnNews:Gingrich goes all magical on Romney
- UnNews:Amazonian sea monster emerges from river
- UnNews:Baby trapped in well turns 25
- UnNews:Gandhi statue coming to life in London featured
- UnNews:Boys who aren't historians celebrate hot Senator
- UnNews:Rape of pregnant women legalized in Virginia
- UnNews:Five million 1950s jokes leaked onto uncyclopedia
- UnNews:Leap year scares old people and children
- UnNews:Why?:Mitt Romney is a dick
- UnNews:Sandra Weisenheimer is dating
- UnNews:U.S. Supreme Court allows everyone to go naked featured plus lead UnNews for ten days. Resulted in The Full Hilary.
- UnNews:Surprise winner of Masters Golf Tournament cries "Ow!" featured
- UnNews:Local man drops vase (rw for 2012 UnNews Pee Buddy Awards)
- UnNews:"Suddenly French Resistance" destroys net censorship
- UnNews:Obama cries like a little baby
- UnNews:PETA demands the right to bear poop
- UnNews:London braces for attack by UFO and Godzilla
- UnNews:Canadian women must now wear horns featured
- UnNews:Aunt Hildred has the cooties
- UnNews:Man marries brown rice featured elsewhere
- UnNews:David Blaine surrounded and attacked by mythical creatures
- UnNews:Recovering New Orleans attempts to host Super Bowl
- UnNews:Father John Murphy assured of elevation to Pope
- UnNews:Meteors entertain the over-winter set in Naples, Florida
- UnNews:Poor people Occupy St. Peter's Square featured
- UnNews:Massage bugs discovered in Uganda featured
- UnNews:Putin and Walesa wed in a truly gay ceremony
- UnNews:The lowdown on dog spit
- UnNews:Martin Luther King's tomb discovered featured
- UnNews:Vegas hosts Abu Ghraib 10th anniversary reunion
- UnNews:JFK was Doctor Who!
- UnNews:Proof of past life on Mars broken by UnNews
- UnNews:The Guy Who Invented Belts Reincarnated as Hacker
- UnNews:Giving you the lowdown on ants
"How can I describe the feeling of having a feature? Let's see. It's like washing your face in gold, getting some in your eyes, and then washing the gold out of your eyes with whores. Something like that."
