Looking to the Horizon

I haven't posted for a while...no one has! School has been very busy, and other things have interfered as well.

I had the flu...it was very nasty and I am still dealing with the effects of it. Since I was actually ill in October...still having effects now is pretty dramatic. Please get the H1N1 vaccine if you are in any way able to!

School is going okay...a bit overwhelming, but it always is at the end of the semester. Currently I have a 2-3 page news analysis and a take-home final for Intro to Social Work, a 3-4 page (single spaced) research paper, a lab exam and a final for Biology, and my final paper for Sociological Methods Seminar, remaining to complete. The last one is the one that is the most stressful. This paper is for a semester long research project involving 8 hours of participant observation in a setting that I chose. The paper will be somewhere around 30 pages, with all the formal elements of a paper being submitted for publication.

I do want to say that I absolutely HATE my Social Work class! So...Jade, I will not be going into social work! :P I'm sticking with nursing as my end goal. I did go to a graduate school forum that people had to be specifically invited to. The invitation was based on GPA, and potential to succeed in graduate school. A faculty member had to submit students' names and then students were chosen to go. The forum was for all of CA and was at UCSC. While I was there I spent a lot of time talking with the Dean of Advanced Practice Nursing from UCSF. UCSF is now my first choice school. Cross your fingers everyone.

One last thing....

I have not heard from or seen any sign of a specific dear friend, her blog is even gone. Emails have gone unanswered, her cell phone is disconnected, and I do not have a land-line number. I am hoping a few of you will know who I am talking about, and maybe know something...she was friends with a few of you as well (Jade, Mamabeak, Kate). I am worried about her and miss her very much. I will be sending out an xmas card as I do have an address, but I would really like to hear from her, or at least know what is going on.

S

Posted by Battle Weary at 10:31 AM 13 comments  

Posted by Battle Weary at 12:36 PM 9 comments  

I've been back in classes for 2 1/2 weeks now. It's going okay. My classes aren't particularly hard, just a lot of work/reading. Unfortunately, I am going on a trip and will miss one full week of classes...so I have to keep up on all the work, AND there is something due the week I will be gone in every class. So I have to do that work early, and turn it in early. A little overwhelming.

I have some exciting news! I was elected President of the honor society I was inducted into last spring! How cool is that?!?

S

Posted by Battle Weary at 6:43 AM 4 comments  

School starts a week from today. In the past I have always been very, very full of anxiety in the couple weeks before the start of the semester. Right now I am anxious...but in a different way. I wish school was starting today! This has been one boring summer! Raine came to visit twice...that was good...her second visit we went to the county fair...this was fun. Raine's visits have been the highlights of the summer. We have basically done nothing at all. No Bass lake this year, Diana started a new job at the end of April...so no time off to go do things...AND...an empty house 5 days a week. Of course there is also the money factor...never enough of it! Sooo...pretty much all I have been doing is reading, and little projects around the house. I have managed to stick with the most critical parts of the schedule I made...getting up, eating, some house work, and going to bed on time. However, I now have to re-adjust my schedule for school...getting up at 7 am won't work when my ride leaves at 6:45 am!

So this time next week I will be at school...probably not in class though, because my first Wednesday class is a lab, and they won't have lab before the first lecture. This will give me time to track down my Bio adviser though, since he is the instructor for that class/lab. Hopefully the rec center will be open, because I will have a very long time until my official first class...it starts at 2pm.

Today I am waiting for the mail to arrive...it's the earliest possible day for my financial aid check to arrive. If it comes today, I have several things I need to get for school...most notably...MY BOOKS!! I like to have them at least a few days before classes start, so I can get the first chapters read...if I know which book we are reading first when there's more than 1 book. Fortunately, there's only 1 Bio book. 1 of my other classes is taught by my Soc adviser, so I can email her and ask which book first. The other class, there is only two books...I may just skim the first chapter of each.

Anyway...I am bored...there's no one ever online anymore...I'm out of leisure reading material again...my house is pretty clean...laundry is done...my office isn't clean but I've already been working on it and needed a break. So...that's my current life in a nutshell!

S

Posted by Battle Weary at 9:41 AM 7 comments  

I haven't posted in a while so I guess it's time for a general update.

From June 1st - 25th I was TA'ing the summer session Human Physiology course. This kept me very busy! Summer session classes are so intense! 1 week of material every day...a midterm every Thursday and 2 lab practicals as well! It was fun...and a lot of physio "stuff" was really solidified for me because answering questions, explaining, trying to come up with examples and analogies, and of course, GRADING EXAMS...really keeps a person on their toes, and requires real understanding of the material. I think it was good for me.

My grades for the spring semester were good...3.914 GPA...that works out to 10 units of A and 4 units of A-. I am happy with this...and I did not freak out when a letter arrived from the Dean of Science and Technology...I already knew what it was, congratulations on making the Dean's list. After the Fall semester, I got the same letter and had some major anxiety before opening it...seems silly now, but it wasn't at the time.

Starting tomorrow, I have a written schedule for the rest of the summer. The counselor at school and I worked on a list f things for the schedule and then I put it together. The idea is that having a schedule will help me to not slide back into bad habits that cause decline in everything. I really don't do well with large amounts of unstructured time. The time is not completely structured, there are lots of spaces of free time...in fact, evenings are completely open from dinner to bed time. I also have a list of things that I can do for fun, to pick from for the open times. What I scheduled were some pretty basic things...times I need to get up, eating, exercise, houshold chores, regular appointments, and bedtime. All but the regular appointments are things that can quickly become an issue for me...so hopefully this helps.

I hope everyone is enjoying summer.

S

Posted by Battle Weary at 8:29 AM 8 comments  

Well...it's all done! My last final was at 3pm today. Now I have to clean my house, which hasn't been done in ages. Raine will be here Friday (I think), to spend the weekend. After that I get a few days of nothing to do then right back to campus! Why you ask? One of the Biology professors asked me to TA his Human Physio summer session class. Which by the way is a PAID position! It's not much pay, but not much is better than nothing. So for 4 weeks, 4 days a week, I will be in Physio lab in the afternoons and grading midterms every weekend.

Also, I was seeing a Psych grad student for a "class" called Psychotherapy experience (Psych 494). It's one unit of upper division Psych credit for me...and counseling experience for the grad student. That was actually working out really well. I would see the grad student once a week and everyone else would see our regular T once a week. I concentrated on the school stress type stuff and the other stuff could be concentrated on in regular t...at least that was the theory, I'm not sure the "other stuff" got worked on, but I assume it did. So anyway, this was for 10 weeks and it ended a few weeks ago. The grad student is now an intern in the campus psych services. Starting in June, I will be seeing her again!

next week I will be able to relax somewhat and get around to blogs again...call my sis-in-law... maybe ride my bike I got in January for the first time!

S

Posted by Battle Weary at 9:40 PM 8 comments  

The research proposal is now officially done. Two research papers (much shorter) and one presentation to go!

S

Posted by Battle Weary at 5:42 AM 6 comments  

Spring break was pretty nice. We had a little trouble getting out of town on the 10th at the time we wanted too...ie. we left hours later than planned! However, we made good time to D's mom's in the S. Central valley. The next morning we managed to get the car loaded and get D's mom and brother both out the door a few minutes ahead of schedule. The trip through Bakersfield, into the San Fernando Valley and over to Marina Del Rey was mostly uneventful, and again we made good time. The 405 (parking lot ;)) was pretty slow and busy, but not really any worse then going through the East Bay area (in our neck of the woods). Anyway, we only had to go 22 miles on the 405.

So, the wedding was fabulous, the hotel was pretty nice, the weather cooperated nicely...all very nice. My favorite Aunt picked me up the day after the wedding, and we went to Venice Beach for the day. That was so much fun! It was REALLY busy...great people watching there! My Aunt worked half-days in the morning the next two days so that we could spend the rest of the day together. We went to Ventura Harbor one day and Old Town Camarillo the next. Both days just walking around, checking out interesting shops, and talking. It was really nice, and very relaxing. The trip home sucked, but we made it and learned that we will choose another way to get home next time!

Now it's reality check time...

Spring break is over and school is full-steam ahead. Looking at the work remaining I am overwhelmed...substantially overwhelmed, no "a little bit" going on here. I have to reading responses, a facilitaton/presentation, and the final for Classical Theory (thats the "easy class"). I need to finish designing a survey, administer the survey, code and analyse the survey, write up my study (which we are currently learning how to do), and prepare to present my study to the class, for Research Methods. And, for Microbiology...a quiz, outline due, and report on a field trip, all due this Friday. Next Friday we have a lab practical and a midterm. There are two more quizes and the final. Plus, finish trying to figure out what my "unknown culture" is, write up that report (with research/references), finish (okay, really start) researching my chosen topic and prepare a web page with my lab partner, and write up the report, prepare for my presentaton on the topic. Then there are still several podcasts and vcasts on the class web page to review and respond to! WAAAAYYY too much work in that calss. I need a nap just from writing about it.

S

Posted by Battle Weary at 11:24 AM 9 comments  

Posted by Battle Weary at 7:44 PM 3 comments  

April is Child Abuse Prevention Month

Posted by Battle Weary at 8:24 AM 1 comments  

So we got 94% on the lab practical and 82% on the midterm. Hopefully we can get a much better grade on the next midterm and final...then with all the other work we've been doin real good on, we can get a A in the class cause we really need a A!

Posted by Battle Weary at 6:13 PM 6 comments  

We have a microbiology midterm today...it's right after the microbiology lab practical! Yeesh.

Posted by Battle Weary at 9:33 AM 3 comments  

Two days before I last posted, my research methods professor delivered her baby. This was actually on the evening of our class...she lectured that morning. We have not had class since then. I also just received an email stating that we will not have class next week. However, all power points for the class are online and our homework is due as stated on the syllabus...it is now due by email though. The teacher also indicates that she is available by email...I've only emailed her once and I did get a speedy response. I'm a little (a lot) stressed over this. I'm very happy for my teacher, but I wonder why, exactly, she chose to go ahead and teach this semester knowing she had a February due date. Research methods is not really a class one can teach themselves! Or, maybe it is. Of my returned assignments, I have gotten 9/10, 10/10, 10/10, and "Your interview protocol and informed consent are fantastic! I have no changes to suggest" 10/10.

So...I am doing VERY well in the class, but the stress is really overwhelming. I'll be honest, I was in tears over the interview protocol. It took far longer than I thought it would take, I had a midterm in another class (microbiology!) to study for, but the protocol was due before the midterm. I had (I thought) no idea what I was doing. It feels pretty good to get such positive feedback, and of course, a good grade, but DAMN! This is so hard.

S

Posted by Battle Weary at 10:07 AM 9 comments  

I have now attended my classes for two weeks. This is going to be a hard semester. The volume of work is going to leave little time for anything else at all. For my blog-friends and "real" friends that are or have recently been in grad school...yeah..I know...undergrad is less work. That is, unless you have two majors, one of which begins you on your research/study 4 semesters before graduation, and the other of which requires a 3.89 in the core math and science classes in order to get into the program when you are finely ready to apply. Throw in that those science classes are FREAKING HARD. I'm on the last one, although I may repeat one of them that I got a "less than desirable" grade in...since when is a B a bad grade?!? AND THEN...factor in that I am TA'ing for Physiology...what was I thinking? WAS I even thinking at all? On the plus side...with the 2 units I will get for being a TA in Physio, I will have 18 units of Biology...I need 20 for a minor. So I may just talk to an adviser and see if I can take a lower division survey course and end up with a Sociology and Pre-nursing major with a Biology minor. That should look pretty good on my Nursing Master's application don't you think?

S

Posted by Battle Weary at 7:13 PM 8 comments  

We got our new bike! Thats really it up there! Took a seriously long time ta find the right bike. One that everybody likes. This is the one we kept comin back ta. We saw this bike in November and then a guy at another bike shop from where we saw this one told us that this bike was sold out everywhere and that the manufacturer wasnt makin it anymore. We drove by the place we saw it in December and didnt see it so we thought it was gone and kept lookin at bikes all over the place. So then a few weeks ago we went ta the store where we saw this one ta get somethin else and there it was! Its kinda hard ta tell in the pic but its black with silver flames and the flames are outlined in hot pink. Its a girls frame but I dont care cause its black with flames! A buncha the girls are stoked cause its got pink on it and its a beach cruiser. A bunch a others are stoked cause its black. We all kinda like that its so retro! So basically, it works for alla us without upsettin anybody cause it dont have somethin they wanted! In a couple weeks we are gonna get a basket for the handle bars...a black one. And yea...we are totally happy bout this!

J

Posted by Battle Weary at 1:15 PM 9 comments  

School starts for the Spring semester in 5 more days. I think I'm glad, and not nervous too much...at least not nervous like have been in the past at the start of a semester.

Last semester apparently I was out only for school and school related things (study groups, papers, etc). It seems this was by my own choice, subconsciously, but my choice just the same. Time was really weird for me when I found myself out on my b-day...and for many days after that. More weird then "normal". That has mostly seemed to straighten out now. It was strange, and hard to deal with...but I think, worth it. I am feeling that my choice to not be out was maybe a wise one. Maybe it's better to lose the time and not be aware that you are lonely...that your friends don't have time for you...that the world really goes on just fine for everyone without your presence.

At school, there are people that are happy to see you, even when you can barely string together "good morning" at 7:15 am while getting your coffee. There are lab partners that seek you out as soon as you enter the lecture hall. Professors that thank you for asking a question or making a comment during lecture. People that wave or come up and ask about a paper or an exam while you are talking to someone else about some other paper or exam. Are they friends? No...not exactly. Although the lab partner may end up being one...and the woman from Social Psych last semester might too (she's off to grad school in the Fall though). What they are, are people to talk to, that miss you if you aren't there, that think you contribute something.

I came out on my bday...the 11th. I talked to one person online that day. Since then...I have talked to no one at all online. I've checked archives on messenger and no one else has talked to anyone since the 12th. No one at all. I've been online all day and most of the evening, everyday since then...visible on messenger most of that time too. No I'm not just sitting here staring at the screen...I turn the speakers up and go do something else...I think I've read somewhere around 35 novels! The entire shopping bag that R sent home with Warrier (I think) and then my neighbor has been letting me raid her shelves. But I am here and available and no one else is. I think it would be better to just go back to not being available again...in 5 days...that will happen.

S

Posted by Battle Weary at 6:55 PM 5 comments  

...is my birthday. The body turned 40. I don't feel 40...I guess that's a good thing, most of the time. Definitely a good thing when I feel like I'm in my 20's...not so good when feel far younger than that.

Tonight we are going out to dinner with L, the neighbor/friend...hopefully I can eat. Been having some trouble with that.

S

Posted by Battle Weary at 3:57 PM 14 comments  

Feelin very blah. Not much else to say...just blah.

Posted by Battle Weary at 5:05 PM 2 comments  

• ► 2013 (1)
  • ► January (1)

• ► 2012 (3)
  • ► October (1)
  • ► March (1)
  • ► January (1)

• ► 2011 (6)
  • ► November (1)
  • ► September (1)
  • ► July (1)
  • ► April (1)
  • ► March (1)
  • ► January (1)

• ► 2010 (9)
  • ► December (1)
  • ► November (1)
  • ► September (1)
  • ► August (1)
  • ► July (1)
  • ► April (1)
  • ► March (2)
  • ► January (1)

• ▼ 2009 (18)
  • ▼ December (1)
    • Long Overdue Update
  • ► September (2)
    • A Few Pictures...
    • I've been back in classes for 2 1/2 weeks now. It...
  • ► August (1)
    • School starts a week from today. In the past I ha...
  • ► June (1)
    • I haven't posted in a while so I guess it's time f...
  • ► May (2)
    • End of the semester
    • The research proposal is now officially done. Two...
  • ► April (4)
    • Spring break was pretty nice. We had a little tro...
    • Spring Break Pics
    • A little late...
    • So we got 94% on the lab practical and 82% on the ...
  • ► March (1)
    • We have a microbiology midterm today...it's right ...
  • ► February (2)
    • Research Methods
    • I have now attended my classes for two weeks. Thi...
  • ► January (4)
    • We got our new bike! Thats really it up there! T...
    • School starts for the Spring semester in 5 more da...
    • Today...
    • Feelin very blah. Not much else to say...just blah.

• ► 2008 (35)
  • ► December (3)
  • ► November (2)
  • ► October (2)
  • ► September (4)
  • ► August (4)
  • ► July (5)
  • ► June (2)
  • ► May (9)
  • ► April (4)